Monday, January 22, 2007

What the !@#$?

Pissed off with no one to blame. That is not a position you want to be in. If you could blame yourself, at least its easier.

Now I'm going to have to figure out how I'm going to survive the next sem. Because I can't prove to my mum how impossible it would be to coordinate 2 schedules and 1 car. Because the online systems are fucked up. Meaning I can't do my brother's bloody schedule for him. Meaning I can't show my mum how ridiculous life is going to be in the next sem.

And the last thing I needed was a reminder of the life that wasn't. But it came anyway. In the most innocent form too. Geez, God. I have to hand it to you. You sure know how to kick a dude in the nuts while he is on the ground. Your timing couldn't have been better. Really.

Right now, all I want to do is shut the bloody world out and sulk. But I can't. And that is annoying. So I applaud You. I'm sure you could do worse, but this sure was quite impressive.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

The myogenic little fellow.

He was normally encased in a steel box, with a little slit at the side to see the outside. No one sees inside, and he hardly ever looks out. He didn't think it was worth his time.

So life went on that way until one day when he decided to have one of those rare peeks into the outside. It was then that he saw it. The effect was mild, but it was there. But it wasn't the first time such a thing happened, so he ignored it. For a while.

He was considering a course of action when it disappeared. In a blink, it was gone. But it appeared again. And again. But each time, it showed up in the distance. Deciding that there was nothing that could be done, he kept moving. Just as he had been doing for as long as he could remember.

Then it appeared one day, closer than it had ever been before. Slightly surprised, he watched it for a while. It didn't move. So he shuffled closer to it. Still it remained motionless.

Intrigued, he decided to grab it. The lid of the steel casing creaked and groaned as the force from the outreaching tendril pushed against years of rust. His movements were tentative at first, but as he drew closer, his confidence grew.

The tendril touched it gently, and still it did not fly. It hardly even flinched. The lid opened a little further, and then a bit more as he slowly came out of the only home he ever knew.

He drew it close and examined it, wanting to take in every detail. As he explored the surface, he knew that there was much more to it than what he saw, and he resolved to find out.

But it was not to be. Before he knew what was happening, it jumped out of his grasp. It danced about in the air for a while, as if willing him to reach out and grab it. He was about to do that when it suddenly surged forward and planted itself firmly on the lid of the chest. Aided by gravity, the piece of metal came crashing down, sealing the chest, while parts of his body were still outside. His reactions hadn't been fast enough, and the lid caught the aorta, severing it.

He has never known such horror before. He could only watch as his innards came gushing out in a stream. The remaining bit of the aorta that was still attached to him flailed about like a flimsy garden hose. He screamed.

The response was quick enough. Neighbours came quickly and slapped on a clip at the open end, sealing it temporarily. Others cleaned up the mess and tended to the severed tissue.

It would be a while before he would be able to return to duty fully functional, and even if he did, he wouldn't be doing it the same way. But return he will, however long it might take.